Wednesday, February 29, 2012

It's been a couple of weeks...

I must apologize in advance for the formatting, spelling and grammatical errors. I am writing this on my iPhone so I'm really not sure how it's going to turn out.

First, last Saturday I spent the day at the hospital. I woke up early to go pick up a last minute gift card for my best friend's little sister's baby shower and I was early for the event and killing time reading a magazine in the parking lot. I noticed that my pulse was racing. I had been hanging out, reading celebrity gossip in my truck for 45 minutes!! I decided to go to the baby shower and relax and keep an eye on it.

After the shower, I came straight home and walked inside and sat on the couch. I took my pulse and it was 125 beats per minute. I waited 15 minutes, and then took it again. 120. Waited another 15 minutes and took it again and it was about 115. Jack just got home from work, so I called the on call line at my drs office. Of course, the doctor on call was the one that I didn't like and when she said I needed to go to the emergency room to check out my heart, I cried.

We let the dogs out, then grabbed our coats and headed to the hospital. Once in the ER, they immediately did an EKG. My heart looked normal except that I had tachycardia and my heart rate was about 130. Then they sent me up to labor and delivery to be monitored to make sure I wasn't in labor. After two hours on the monitors, the L&D team decided that I wasn't in labor and obstetrically I was fine. They released me back to the ER.

I was shuffled to two more rooms and finally saw an ER doc who wanted to hook me up to machines to monitor me for a while to see how things looked. Long story short, 4+ hours later, they decided that a heart rate above 100 was just normal for me at that stage in my pregnancy. He advised that I see my OB on Monday and a cardiologist.

I called on Monday to my OB and they wanted me to just keep my Wednesday appointment and referred me to a cardiologist. I made my cardiologist appointment for Thursday.

Wednesday rolled around and the OB I saw was very concerned with me seeing the cardiologist. She seemed very concerned that labor might damage my heart and wanted reassurance that my heart was healthy and up to the task. She scheduled a growth ultrasound for the next week and then wished me luck with the cardiologist.

The cardiologist was a nice man who performed another EKG and an echo cardio gram (an ultrasound of my heart) and everything checked out great. He concluded that this must just be normal for me and that my heart shows no signs of disease or disfunction at all. He said he felt confident to allow me to go through labor without being concerned for my safety.

The next week, I had a growth ultrasound before my doctors appointment. Jack met me at the doctor after he got off work and we got to see our little man. He is measuring in the 40th percentile and fluid looks great and he's definitely still a boy lol. My blood pressure then checked out great and the doctors appointment went really fast.

Fast forward one more week to today, I had an appointment at 10:30am. My blood pressure was really high for me so the nurse took it twice. 146/86. Ruh-roh.

Doctor came in and asked a bunch of questions. And then decided she wanted me to go to labor and delivery to get a non stress test to monitor the baby and monitor me for a little while to see if my blood pressure would go down. They did bloodwork and monitored me for a couple hours. Jack left work and came to be with me. It was much more comfortable than my last time since I kept my clothes on and last time, I was stuck in an uncomfortable torture device also known as the hospital gown.

My blood pressure went down and then back up. I also got to watch the monitor at each of my contractions. I knew I was having them and it was pretty cool to watch the monitor record them. Baby is still doing great and eventually they decided to just let me go home and gave me a list of symptoms to watch for for pre-eclampsia. I have to go back to the doctor in a day or so to be rechecked for my blood pressure.

So. Now I think everything is caught up. I am officially having a March baby because there are 11 minutes left in February 2012. I can almost officially say that I'm having a baby this month!! This roller coaster has been so amazing and I really really can't believe this is almost over. My pregnancy has gone by so incredibly fast. Even with the unbelievable morning sickness, I can still say for sure that I'm sad it went by so fast. God only knows if I will ever experience a miracle like this ever again!

I think everything is all set for his arrival. I have my entire stash of cloth diapers prepped and ready to go. I have my lanolin at the ready for breast feeding. The hospital bags are packed, he has an entire wardrobe for a year solid. Every baby item we have is set up and ready to be used. I really spend each day now just looking for something extra to do to get ready.

I think the only baby items we really need to get is a baby bath tub. I can't think of anything else off the top of my head!

Alright y'all, hopefully I will be able to fall asleep now but unfortunately I don't feel any more tired than I did when I started writing this. Again, I'm sorry for any mistakes... I typed this Whr thing out using my index finger on my iPhone.

Monday, February 13, 2012

35 Weeks Pregnant / 35 days go to

How far along:  35 weeks... a little belated. Saturday we had a little hospital visit that took up the whole day.
How big is baby: 
He's big. lol. Over 5lbs probably.

Maternity clothes:  Yes.  I'm ready for normal clothes again! :0)
Sleep: I'm still not sleeping very comfortably but I am sleeping deeper for the hours that I am sleeping which is awesome.
Best moment of the week:  I suppose it was leaving the hospital on Saturday knowing that the baby was great and that I am going to be fine.  And getting maternity photos back.
Food aversions:  Nothing
Food cravings: Chinese food I guess. 
Symptoms: sore back, braxton hicks, swelling.
Movement: LOTS of movement this week.
What I’m looking forward to:  His birth!!
Next appt: This week!

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Saturday, February 4, 2012

34 Weeks Pregnant

How far along:  34 Weeks Pregnant!!!
How big is baby: 

Watch what you say! Your curious baby is listening in to your conversations at 34 weeks -- and might enjoy a lullaby or two -- so go ahead and sing to him. Some say that baby will recognize songs mom sings while he’s in the womb, and may even be more easily soothed by them if he’s used to them once he’s on the “outside.” At week 34, you might breathe a little easier, since baby may descend lower into your pelvis and give your lungs some space. (Ahh!) Of course, some babies don’t do this until the day they’re born, so we’re not making any guarantees. The pitfall of this descent, of course, is even more pressure on your bladder, so be prepared to make even more trips to the ladies room over the coming weeks.
Your baby's the size of a durian!
At less than two months to go, he weighs in at about 4.2 pounds to 5.8 pounds and measures about 17.2 to 18.7 inches.

your baby at 34 weeks
  • He's recognizing and reacting to simple songs, if you're singing them. (If you're not, start! He may find them soothing after birth.)
  • He's also urinating about a pint a day.

pregnancy symptoms at 34 weeks
  • Blurry vision, created by a combination of hormones, fluid buildup and lack of sleep.
  • Fatigue. Now, if only you could sleep at night!
  • Constipation and hemorrhoids. Make sure you're getting plenty of fiber.
  • Swollen ankles and feet. Put up those feet, mama-to-be!
  • As baby prepares for her arrival, you might feel pressure down lower in your pelvis, and even more frequent peeing.

Maternity clothes:  Yes.  I'm ready for normal clothes again! :0)
Sleep: I have had a couple awesome nights of sleep this past week where I only woke up twice and ahhhh what a welcome relief.
Best moment of the week:  On Sunday, we had our hospital tour.  I am so excited.  I had to hold back tears the whole time I was there since it's still so surreal.  I also got some early birthday presents from Jack (Some Rumparooz LiL Joey's All-in-One cloth diapers!!).  Also when I was told I'm measuring almost 2 weeks ahead ... I've been saying that I think he's going to be a February baby... Leap year baby please :)!!
Food aversions:  Nothing
Food cravings: Meh.  Nothing really substantial this week.  I wish berries were in season though.
Symptoms: Sore back, hips, pelvis, being able to breath better, I'm pretty sure the baby has dropped.  Itchy stomach, my fingers are too swollen to wear my wedding rings any more :( Still throwing up here and there. Lots of growing in my belly.  Contractions.
Movement:  The last two days I swear he has not moved at all and then he slept like a rock last night and he's barely moving this morning, I'm pretty sure he has to be exhausted from the last two days.
What I’m looking forward to: Getting maternity pictures back... supposed to happen today, hopefully! Also my birthday is on Monday.  The big 2-6 ;)
Next appt: Valentine's Day or the day after? I don't remember. My last 2 week out appointment and then I'm on to once a week!!!

Friday, February 3, 2012

Realization is beginning to set in.

I am sure this seems sort of strange to most, since most haven't gone through infertility before pregnancy, but let me tell you... Getting pregnant after infertility takes some getting used to.  I'm 34 weeks pregnant and STILL not used to this.  I STILL find myself overwhelmed with emotions about how grateful and surprised I am.  I am still in shock that my belly grows every day and that I can feel this baby kicking me. 

Now that I'm getting close to full term (37 weeks) I am starting to have to deal with the thoughts and realization that soon I won't be pregnant any more... and when I'm no longer pregnant, that means I will have a baby. (Lord willing of course... <-- see that there? That's the infertile inside me still trying to point out that ANYTHING could still happen.)

There's a song that I have always loved about wondering what it will be like the day we meet our Lord... (I Can Only Imagine by MercyMe) and while I know that meeting my son for the first time will be absolutely NOTHING like meeting my Savior face to face, it's the words of the song that I can relate to about what it will be like or even wondering what it will be like to meet my child too. 

I can only imagine
What it will be like
When I walk
By your side

I can only imagine
What my eyes will see
When your face
Is before me
I can only imagine

I can only imagine

Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel
Will I dance for you Jesus or in awe of you be still
Will I stand in your presence or to my knees will I
Will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all
I can only imagine

I can only imagine

I can only imagine
When that day comes
And I find myself
Standing in the Sun
[| From: |]

I can only imagine
When all I will do
Is forever
Forever worship You
I can only imagine

I can only imagine

Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel
Will I dance for you Jesus or in awe of you be still
Will I stand in your presence or to my knees will I
Will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all
I can only imagine

I can only imagine

I can only imagine
i can only imagine

I can only imagine
When all I will do
Is forever, forever worship you

I can only imagine

I realize that there will be a huge difference between meeting God who gave me Life and my son... but go with this.  "I can only imagine, What my eyes will see when your face Is before me I can only imagine..." and "Will I stand in your presence or to my knees will I fall, will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all? I can only imagine..."  I can only imagine what it will be like when I set my eyes on our child for the first time. These lines in the song really speak to how I feel about this.  (Obviously I'm not going to forever worship my son... just take these lyrics out and have them by themselves!)

Even the thought of seeing my child brings me to tears most of the time.  I can't imagine what it's going to be like to look in his face and in his eyes.  I can't imagine what it will be like to see myself and to see Jack in this tiny person looking back at us.  I can't imagine what it will be like to feel so much love in one moment, towards my husband, towards my child and most of all towards God who brought us such a miracle.

Will I fall to my knees and cry?  I have no idea, but I can only imagine since that's what I did when I saw the positive pregnancy test.  

I guess I have gotten to the crying part of my pregnancy.  I think I have cried quite a bit (in a good, overwhelmed emotionally way) throughout my pregnancy, but for the most part I cry in the truck while I'm driving somewhere.  I'll be day dreaming and then suddenly be overwhelmed by some thought or realization and then start to cry, or I will be listening to a song and then be overwhelmed and cry.  But now, it's different.  

The other night, I scooted very close to Jack to have him put his arm around me before we fell asleep.  He was uncomfortable so he told me... he was grumpy but mostly because he looooves his sleep.  I told him he was mean and then started crying.  I was crying so hard that I had to go downstairs and catch my breath.  

And I don't cry.  I'm not a crier.  I don't just break down and try to get my way, I don't cry to get out of a ticket, I don't cry like that.  Usually the only time I cry is if someone dies.  

Now I have to warn Jack if his tone of voice is getting a little uncomfortable for me that he's about to make me cry... or if he rolls his eyes I will cry... or if he doesn't want a certain thing for dinner, I. Will. Cry.  

Welcome to crying-over-emotional-can't-hold-it-together part of Pregnancy.  God bless my poor husband.