Sunday, April 28, 2013

32 Weeks Pregnant w/#2!

This week, Baby is:
2.5 to 3.8 pounds and measures about 15.2 to 16.7 inches

How far along? 32 Weeks Pregnant!!

Due date: 6.23.13

Maternity clothes? yes... my belly is starting to get so big that my shirts are becoming shorter and shorter.

Sleep: I guess I'm kind of sleeping!

Weight gain: +21 I think? I'm not sure

Best moment this week: Midwife appointment where I got to feel exactly where the baby was and feel his/her head! 

Food cravings: Nothing, just very hungry.

Movement: Every day.

Symptoms: BAD hip and back pain! Heartburn a little bit too. 

Labor Signs: no

Stretch Marks: yep, leftover stripes from Arie man

Swelling? No

Belly Button in or out? Still in!

What I miss: my jeans and regular clothing! Being able to move and sleep comfortably.

Feeling toward Pregnancy: Really getting excited about the home birth... nervous that my midwife will be out of town my whole 36th week! 

What I am looking forward to: Ordering HB supplies.

Milestones: Only a couple weeks left until I'm full term!! 

News: not much new that I can think of :)

Saturday, April 20, 2013

Best Friend in Labor

Last night my best friend texted to say that she thought her water broke or that she was leaking and she was having contractions. She ended up being able to go to sleep and it stopped.

Tonight by an amazing twist of fate, Arie woke up and right then my phone lit up! She had been having contractions five minutes apart for 2 hours.

We have been texting for almost the last two hours as she rides through her contractions and her husband sleeps in bed next to her.

(Can we say second child syndrome?! Hahaha!)

She's packing her bags now and getting things ready to go so she stopped texting but I don't know how I'll sleep!

I'm praying that she gets her vbac!!!

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Hungry! And baby sleep!

Arie fell asleep around 8pm and I think was fully asleep by 8:30pm. At about 10pm, we got into bed. I nursed him again because he woke up from the jostling. At about 11, I got up to pee. I woke up to pee again at 3:30am and Arie woke up a few minutes after I got back in to bed. So that's 7 hours!! Weee!

And I've noticed that I've been hungry! I think it's likely two-fold. I just started dairy free again on Sunday, so I'm going through transition and a detox of sorts where my body is used to me grabbing whatever's fastest and closest and having to process that food, to having to plan meals and consciously decide to eat healthy foods.

Also, I'm adjusting to cooking dairy free foods again and not every meal is a raving success, so I think I'm eating less at each meal. I made meatloaf and mashed potatoes for dinner and I accidentally boiled the potatoes for too long and when I mashed them (to make them dairy free, I just used their own cooking liquid) they turned gummy! Even Arie wouldn't eat them. The meatloaf was good though!

I changed Arie at about 4am and have been rocking him since. He's not falling back to sleep peacefully, but he has been fighting some kind of bug for days and I think he just doesn't feel good and is uncomfortable.

I'm hungry though and wishing I had a snack. Before I got in to bed, I had Jack bring me a banana. Now I wish I had something up here that I could munch on.

As I'm sitting here, I'm looking around the room, wondering how to rearrange for making room for baby #2. I think I need to draw up a couple room diagram ideas. I think I want to add a pack n play in here so that I have a place to set baby while I'm rocking Arie. I can see a couple sleepless months in mine and Jack'a future for sure as Arie gets used to me being up and out of the bed.

This is going to be a trip.

Monday, April 15, 2013

Crib sleeping update

In the past week or so, it appears as though Arie is either fighting some sort of bug or teething. Either way, he's had a fever a couple of days and now he's got a runny nose. Poor little guy!

He's also been attached to me. There is no way he would sleep in his crib. At night, if I have a chance to roll the other way to try to stretch out and get comfortable, he will climb up on my pillow and sleep on top of my head, or, he will climb over top of me to sleep by my chest.

He knows what he needs, who am I to argue?

I think we might end up rearranging our room a little bit to make room for baby number two. We will see.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Breastfeeding while pregnant

There really isn't as much out there as I would have liked on breastfeeding while pregnant. I searched and searched for someone with a similar situation as I was in, exclusively breastfed baby, not eating solids, still nursing every 1.5-2 hours around the clock, and, with a severe food allergy requiring me to eat a very strict diet. I was devastated and petrified that I would lose my supply and I felt like continuing to nurse was essential.

Arie was 7 months old when I found out that I was pregnant with #2. We were planning to wait to introduce solid foods until he was a year old because of the severity of his sensitivities.

He is now over 13 months old and still gets probably 60-75% of his nutrition from breastmilk.

An overwhelming amount of what I read about breastfeeding while pregnant hinted that one of several things would happen: that I would lose my supply, mostly long before baby arrived; that my child would self wean because my milk will change to colostrum again for the new baby; or, that I would find it too uncomfortable/painful/unpleasant to continue and would choose to wean.

One of those things, I had control over. I was absolutely determined that when we end our nursing relationship that it will not be because of me. I wanted this to be available to Arie as long as he wants/needs it.

I carefully and borderline obsessively monitored Arie's weight, behavior, and output making sure that I retained my supply. I have continued to allow Arie to nurse 100% on demand, 24 hours a day. I continued to bed share with him and allow him to nurse all night long, just as we had been.

I was advised by Arie's pediatrician to night wean him because he needed to gain weight (say what?! Yeah, we fired her after that.) and, to wean him completely around his first birthday because "it will just be too hard to breastfed two babies on demand." Excuse me?! I'm pretty sure that's completely up to me.

I completely disregarded that asinine recommendation. I wasn't going to wean him at night and I certainly wasn't going to do anything that might put my supply in jeopardy! All I can do looking back is shake my head at how foolish that was to say.

As the months have gone by, Arie has thrived. Some days he nurses more than others. He is still breastfed on demand and nurses for comfort whenever he's tired, overwhelmed, or gets hurt. Nothing has really changed with that except that he now lays curled around my growing belly instead of flat against me.

This journey has not been without challenges, however. Pregnancy brings nipple sensitivity second to none. There were a few months where, when Arie would latch, I would cry out or have to ball my fists. It was excruciating pain.

There have also been many times where my emotional brain has just had enough stimulation and I want my space and I do my best to get every part of me not touching Arie when he nursed and unlatched him as soon as possible.

We also went through his learning to bite and then not to bite phase while pregnant. And, like I said, nipple sensitivity during pregnancy is unlike any other.

For the first 16 weeks or so, I threw up almost every day, all hours of the day. The vomiting comes and goes, but HG with a baby to take care of brings its own challenges without adding breastfeeding 24/7 as well. I still have bouts of nausea and vomiting. I have breastfed laying in a hospital bed with an IV in my arm for fluids from dehydration. (Should have gotten a picture of that madness!)

I can definitely understand why moms choose to wean during pregnancy.

But, I have been determined. We sort of go through highs and lows now. Some days, I don't want to be touched. Some days, I nurse with a barf bowl next to me. Some days, it hurts so bad I can't help but cry out in pain.

Through it all, I'm almost 30 weeks pregnant. I am so very happy that I have stuck it out and I wouldn't trade this for the world. I believe that breastfeeding is the best thing that I can do for my child(ren) and I love that I have not let anything stop me.

I just noticed that it appears as though my milk has changed back to colostrum without me knowing. Something about colostrum makes me so excited. I was so excited when it showed up when I was about 20 weeks pregnant with Arie, and it really is this special high that I can't explain. Obviously, I know my boobs "work" but to see the process starting over for number two, so seamlessly, is just amazing. God's design never ceases to amaze me.

Arie is still happily nursing away.

If you're like me, newly pregnant and frantically searching for a success story of breastfeeding while pregnant, you've found it!

I can't wait to experience nursing both of my babies!

Sunday, April 7, 2013

29 Weeks Pregnant w/#2

This week, Baby is:
15.2in to 16.7in and 2.5 to 3.8lbs!!

How far along? 29 weeks pregnant!

Due date: 6.23.13

Maternity clothes? yes... my belly is starting to get so big that my shirts are becoming shorter and shorter.

Sleep: meh.  Every time I wake up to nurse Arie, I am wide awake for a long time afterwards.

Weight gain: +19

Best moment this week: Baby's moving all the time.

Food cravings: Sweets. Still. Ugh.

Movement: Every day.

Symptoms: Same back and hip pain... Chiropractor is loving the business, I'm sure ;)

Labor Signs: no

Stretch Marks: yep, leftover stripes from Arie man

Swelling? No

Belly Button in or out? I think I'm officially going to have an outie by the end of this!

What I miss: my jeans!

Feeling toward Pregnancy: Can't believe I'm actually pregnant, AGAIN, and can't believe that not only am I pregnant... it's almost over!

What I am looking forward to: Ordering HB supplies.

Milestones: Third trimester!!

News: not much new that I can think of :)

Saturday, April 6, 2013

Bed time / crib success

I need to brag about our bed time/crib sleeping success before I go back to sleep!

I think Arie fell asleep after nursing at about 9pm, and I was watching videos on my phone while rocking him (hello, headphones!! How have I done this without you for 13 months?!) and I finally set Arie in his crib at 10. I went to sleep at 10:45pm and Arie slept in his crib until almost 2am!!

I got up and brought him in bed and nursed him and he tossed and turned for probably 20-25 minutes and we checked his diaper and he had leaked and his clothes were wet. So we got up to change him and then I rocked him back to sleep and caught up on some more YouTube subscriptions and I just set Arie back down at about 3am. He's back in his crib!!

Of course, as I was laying here, before thinking to blog about it, I noticed that our bedroom door was wide open. This is not unusual, as the dogs and cat come and go as they please. However, tonight, my paranoid mom brain realized that if Arie is not in bed and right next to me, someone could sneak in and take him.

I got back out of bed and closed and locked the bedroom door. Sorry animals!

Ahhh the irrational mom brain! How on earth do parents sleep with their children in another room, or, God forbid, another FLOOR?! Thank God Jack totally agrees that it's not time for Arie to be in his own room yet. I think he's happy this crib transition is working out well so far, but definitely is not time to move him to his own room!

So before I waste another good night's sleep, I am going to attempt to get this almost-29-weeks-pregnant-belly comfortable and see if I can't go back to sleep!

I'm really glad we waited until it was the right time for Arie and the right time for me to try the crib again. It's slightly more challenging trying to get up quickly with a big belly or sitting up fast every time I hear a peep, but I think it's the right time anyway.

Could he possibly start sleeping through the night before baby number two comes? We can dream ;)

Thursday, April 4, 2013

Bed time.

It's 7:51pm and I've been rocking and nursing for 15-20 minutes now.

Also, how is it that Arie is 13 months old tomorrow and I just now thought to use headphones with my phone so I can watch videos? At least I figured that out before June :)

Arie refused steak and asparagus for dinner and got scrambled eggs instead. :/ now I'm the mom who makes my kid something special to eat. Oh well. Add that to the list of things I didn't expect to be doing.

I need to be productive tomorrow. I want to go to the chiropractor and I have a bunch of housework that I would like to get done.

And I don't know if Arie has nursed more today, or what is going on, because my nipples are SORE again. They were like this for a while earlier in my pregnancy. The problem now is when he wants to nurse for 30+ minutes. It's like mentally and physically, I just can't take it now. I have to do my best to distract myself while he's pinching and scratching me as he falls asleep.

8:20, he's asleep. I was starting to get cramps and had to unlatch him. I put him up on my shoulder and the cramps were pretty painful, but he's finally asleep and now I feel like the uterine cramps are calming down and I can relax a little and rock him until he's completely asleep . I'm going to attempt the crib again but it might be a different story since he's chest to chest with me and will notice when my warmth is gone. :/ we will see.

8:45pm, put him in his crib. Now I'm going to attempt to get some sleep unlike staying up all night like last night!

9:45pm, I was dead asleep and disoriented when Arie woke up and cried. I got out of bed and brought him in with me. Jack hadn't even come to bed yet. He was up around 12, and then about 3, he sat up, wide awake and grunted the way he does when he's up for the day. I woke up to see him leap towards Jack's face and start smacking him in excitement.

He was soaking wet, so Jack got up and changed him. When he brought him back, I tried to nurse him back to sleep, I tried Rubbing and patting and cuddling, but Arie kept tossing and turning. I got up to rock him and for an hour he wouldn't go to sleep and I got up and changed him again. Soaking set again. I guess I still don't have to wonder if I've lost my supply...

It's now 4:57, Jack's alarm keeps going off and for some reason, Arie won't fall completely back to sleep. I'm waiting for Jack to get up for the day and hoping he will get me some strawberries, a banana and a bagel because I'm starving!

Successful nap?

It's 3:10pm and I set Arie down at about 2pm in his crib. He woke up and fussed and I was able to shh and pat and rub his back and he fell back to sleep. I was able to take a shower and record my newborn diaper stash.

Just laying in bed now watching YouTube videos with my phone and headphones. I was able to shower and get dressed too.

I should start thinking about dinner.
Steak and potatoes? Steak for sure.

Nap time crib attempt

Last night for some reason, I could not fall back asleep.

I put Arie back in his crib at 4, and he slept in there for two hours... I was awake the whole time. Fail. And win at the same time.

Unfortunately, I'm pretty grouchy today from being up from 2:30am to 6, but that's really my own fault.

I did eat a bit better today, and then got distracted by some candy before lunch. Why do I even keep this crap in the house?? If I have to work for it, I will make another (better) choice!

Anyway, I am rocking Arie. Unmatched him at 1:40, planned to put him in his crib at 1:45 if he was still sleeping, but I started writing this instead. 1:50?

I want to take a shower and record my newborn cloth diaper stash video while Arie naps. I would love a good two hour nap, but I'm probably dreaming here.

Back in the crib / back in bed

It's 4:01am, I set him down, only had to pat for a minute, and he's sleeping in his bed. For now. I went pee and got back in bed and got comfortable, now the game of me falling back asleep begins. :/

I need it to be super sunny when I wake up tomorrow because I need a nice, warm, sunshiny day to pull me out of this funk. I think I also need a coffee, but I have zero coconut milk creamer. I think I hate coconut milk now lol.

I hate feeling sick in the middle of the night

I have not been eating that well the past few days, and it has REALLY started to affect my attitude. I'm so so irritable and grouchy. I desperately need to change that today.

And, now, it's almost 3:30am, Arie nursed at 2:30am and I'm rocking and hoping to put him back in the crib. I'm starting to feel nauseous. I hate that. So I'm grouchy as can be and now nauseous and Arie doesn't deserve to have me be short tempered. (I guess Jack doesn't either, but he's not awake, and not subject to me right now lol)

I also started feeling restless legs this evening, which is a sure sign to me that I need to be much more vigilant about taking my vitamins!

I went grocery shopping yesterday and bought a TON of beef, I must be low on Iron! Lol

Also, we finally bit the bullet and bought some baby girl clothes. I kinda regret doing it because now I'm super excited about possibly having a girl. I remember either before Arie was born or right after talking to my MIL about having more children. Everyone (well, most people who know us) knows that we don't prevent pregnancy, although I bet people will think we will change our mind after this... And I think the subject of having all boys came up. I remember telling mil about some girl that I watch on YouTube who has 5 boys. I remember telling her that I would love to have five boys.


This is an aspect of being team green that I did not expect. It is really hard to hope for one or the other, and I'm really trying not to. Up until recently, I've just said, and fully believed, that it makes absolutely zero difference what the sex of the baby is. And I was/am right, so I don't know what my issue is now.

If we have a boy, we have absolutely Everything covered. We've been there, done that (aside from this time not circumcising, but that's much less work this time!) we have all of the wardrobe, and likely it will be correct for the appropriate seasons again, and we will always have a hand me down wardrobe for him. I adore being a mom to a boy. Love love love having a son. I desperately wanted Arie to be a boy and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Somehow, somewhere, however, I have found myself getting excited about maybe having a girl too. And instead of feeling like its really crazy exciting either way, which is the reality, I feel like I will be disappointed either way. What?! No seriously! I don't understand what is going on in my brain, and it's driving me bonkers.

Eileen (my midwife) sent me a message yesterday letting me know that they are offering free ultrasounds done by students at a local college this weekend. I immediately replied no thanks, but now my resolve has started to crumble. I have started to question my team green decision and Jack is no help. He doesn't remind me of why I wanted team green, he just repeats that he's always wanted to know and that it's up to me.

I think after Saturday passes and the opportunity passes, I will feel much better. I also think I need to go through Arie's newborn clothing and get excited all over again about having a boy. Then I can be back to equally as excited for both and get out of this stupid funk. I mean, come ON! I'm having ANOTHER miracle baby, and we didn't even have to wait for this one!!

It's stupid that I'm feeling so overly emotional all triggered by the offer of an ultrasound and clothes shopping. I did buy a super cute newborn boy outfit yesterday too. I don't understand my brain right now. Being pregnant does insane things to your rational mind.

It's 3:45am, I'm tired and grouchy. I also stayed up until after 11 because I had put Arie in his crib again for the first stretch and I didn't expect it to last. He ended up not waking up until 12:30, so I got a little over 2 hours of him in the crib. He usually sleeps a long stretch from now until maybe 6 or 6:30, (lol at 3 hours being a long stretch for a 13 month old).

Oh yeah, I bet that's another reason I'm grouchy. I'm to the point in my pregnancy where I'm irritable with being kicked or scratched or climbed on, so to get more comfortable sleep, I want my space, hence why Arie is now being put in his crib after he falls asleep... The only problem is, I can't sleep without him! Lose/lose!

Hopefully we both get used to him in his crib. He's just at the foot of the bed and its muuuuch less scary than when he was a newborn and I put him in there.

Pregnancy is making me a lunatic.

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Attempting the crib

I nursed Arie to sleep and set him in his crib about 15 minutes ago. He's got his white noise machine running under the crib and I miss him already!!

Maybe he's ready to sleep in the crib.

I have no idea.

We will see if I feel like rocking and nursing back to sleep in the middle of the night, or if he just comes to bed with me.

He just curled up against the crib slats lol.

I am not sure what I'm expecting or hoping for, but this feels kinda sad to me. I miss my baby! How silly. He's less than 6 feet away from me in his crib at the foot of my bed!

He's been asleep since about 9:30, in his crib since 9:45. It's 10:03 and I'm going to try to sleep.


Yesterday's nap was in the crib, he only slept an hour, but it was a nice hour to myself. I showered and did my makeup.

Last night he spent the first hour in the crib, and woke up upset and then came to bed with me. Maybe if I keep trying, he will get more comfortable and sleep longer stretches.

I'm not going to force it, but I think at this point, it is worth a try.

Monday, April 1, 2013

Attempting the crib

I nursed Arie to sleep and set him in his crib about 15 minutes ago. He's got his white noise machine running under the crib and I miss him already!!

Maybe he's ready to sleep in the crib.

I have no idea.

We will see if I feel like rocking and nursing back to sleep in the middle of the night, or if he just comes to bed with me.

He just curled up against the crib slats lol.

I am not sure what I'm expecting or hoping for, but this feels kinda sad to me. I miss my baby! How silly. He's less than 6 feet away from me in his crib at the foot of my bed!

He's been asleep since about 9:30, in his crib since 9:45. It's 10:03 and I'm going to try to sleep.